An appointment can take a whole afternoon when you are not the one driving. Getting him there and back takes a ride that will wait, help him in and out of the car, and arrive on time both ways. There are several ways to arrange that, and they are not interchangeable.
Local option: New Plan Care gives families in the St. Louis area in-home help so a parent can stay home: companionship, help with bathing and dressing, meals, and overnight care. Call (314) 405-0887.
The three options worth comparing
Volunteer driver programs are usually run through a congregation, a senior center, or a community organization. Drivers often use their own cars and may stay for the visit. Booking often needs several days of notice, and the pool of drivers can thin out on busy weeks.
App-based rides are quick to book and available at most hours. Ask whether a wheelchair-accessible vehicle is available if he needs one, whether the driver will wait at the building, and whether you can schedule the return ride in advance. Drivers change from trip to trip, so the same person may not come twice.
Paratransit and dial-a-ride services are run by many transit agencies. They usually require an eligibility application and a booking window, often a day or more ahead. They are built for people with mobility needs and often pick up at the door.
Compare them on the things that go wrong
Lead time: can you get a ride for next Tuesday, or do you need to book three days out? Waiting: does the driver stay while he is inside, or do you have to book the return separately? Help at the door: will the driver walk him in and help with a coat or walker, or only wait at the curb? Fit: will the vehicle take his walker or wheelchair, folded or unfolded? Cancellation: what does canceling cost, and how far ahead must you do it? Overruns: if the appointment runs long, what happens to the pickup?
Start with the appointment list
Gather the next two or three appointments and write down the times, the addresses, and whether he needs to arrive early for check-in. Call each option with those details and ask them to repeat back the pickup time and the return plan. A ride that works for one visit can fail on the next if the clinic moves or the return was never booked.
For local options in the St. Louis area, Local Help for a Widowed Father in St. Louis is a good place to start looking.
The stubborn part
He may say he can drive himself, or that a driver is a fuss. Let him keep his say on which option he likes. Offer him two choices and let him pick between them, along with the time of day. People who are pushed into a ride are often hard to get into the car. People who chose it are more likely to sit down and stay put.